........ for me, ever since Magnus Magnusson's 1974 program, Unsolved Mysteries, any story that refers to the Loch Ness Monster generally catches my eye.....
So after all these years and without proof positive, I have generally come to conclusion that Nessy does not exist. We have enough modern technology and no matter how wide, how long or how deep Loch Ness maybe..... we should be able to find the fish, the one photo'd so many times......
And so this very weekend, there was the news story, from non other a self styled Nessy Expert.
As George Edwards peered into the grey mist that lay over Loch Ness, he glimpsed a dark hump slinking in and out of the grey waters.
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2183094/Skipper-claims-finally-proof-Loch-Ness-Monster-exists.html
He claims :
He even says image was verified by team of US military monster experts
What the fooking hell is a US military monster expert ? Surely not the same knobs who were looking for WMD in Iraq,.... having read the nessy article who knows, they could be...
He then goes on to say [and this was the bit that got me shaking my head at the screen, shaking in dismay] :
Far too many people have being seeing them for far too long, he said. The first recorded sighting was in 565AD and there have been thousands of eye witness reports since then. All these people can’t be telling lies
And so it is I ask my self just one question.......why can't all these people be telling lies ?? ..... man [and woman] has been telling lies from the moment he could speak [or even sign language before that !]
But reading this so called newspaper report, you would think.....where is the most basic and rudimentary of proof tests being applied........ Anyone who is a tad less cynical than me, would be thinking..... hey this guy might have a point you know.
But the most fundamental question that the reporter seems to have omitted to ask good ole George Edwards is this:
So George, what a wonderful story, George, I can call you George can't I ? [that's not the question btw but George nods his head, smiling his agreement to being called George]...... well then George my question is this [this is the fundamental question] ...... are you nuts ?
At that point without waiting to hear George's answer I would close my note book, gather up my things and head back to London; I would say to my editor, you are sooooooo not gunna believe this but this guy says the Loch Ness monster is real, and get this, he say's there is more than one of them !
Now I realise George, you might be reading this and thinking yeah yeah... I may well mock you .... but I will say this, either George is nuts or.... or this could be the real reason for this story.......... his Nessy Spotting boats trips are having a lean time, and he has conjured up some brilliant publicity.
But as for you, so called Journalist, Mr Matt Blake...... yes you Mr Blake, I mean you..... shame on you for your lazy writing and failing to report like a grown up.... Seriously what possessed you to write such CRAP..........who knows maybe you sat in front of the telly in 1974 watching Magnus Magnusson's program, Unsolved Mysteries and have just not matured in to adultum !!
Of course this needs a song of the day....
It should be this me thinks...... [mainly because I had it playing in the car blast loud on Sunday and its the first time I have listened to it in ages, but there are some other clues with this song]