China middle aged woman .....

... It has been the best part of 40 years since I last visited main land China, and such is the change I saw on my arrival...... I could have been in any modern western metropolis ...... unlike the industrial town of Dalian in 1980.

Back then, there were very few private cars on the road, , most people were bedecked in Chairman Mao suits and riding push bikes. There was a road side butchers stall with the meat hanging in the open with string from the wooden stall, with the finest pigs head on show.

At the main dept store, we weren't even given real money to spend, just visitors notes ..... and as you walked in ... the most obvious ..... spittoons at each entrance to the store .....

Fast forward 40 years [or so] and the roads are filled with cars ..... even a Porsche Boxster .... KFC's ...... designer stores ....... people fixated at their palms, seduced by their smart phones ...... Micky D's and even a 'fake' Rover 75 ......

A taxi driver was using a smart phone for sat nav and a second phone to have a videochat .... all whilst driving .......

Although the funny thing was no spittoons ...... that having been said traveling in the airport shuttle bus .... the driver snorted up what sounded like a gold watch ..... and must have been hankering after the good old days ...... but instead he wound down the bus window and with a resounding thrup ..... it hit the tarmac ..... loverly I thought .....

I did discover though ...... that I and a chinese taxi driver had something in common. It was only by pure happenstance we should have met as well ..... for my journey to Heathrow, I thought I would buy a new thermos flask. I went to my local Tesco and looking through ... there was a very trendy style fliptop one .... not a flask, not a mug .... but somewhere in between ..... never seen them before, but that'll be perfect .....

Well bugger my old sea boots, as I was traveling in the taxi to the Mausoleum of the Western Han Dynasty of the Nanyue King ...... in between his video chats .... the taxi driver leant over to the other seat ..... and picked up ..... a fliptop thermos flask ... identical to one the I had recently bought ..... who'd have thought it .... a Chinese taxi driver shopping at my local Tesco store ......

Today's SoD was written by David Bowie and Iggy Pop around the time I was last in China .... it is said .... although I was not there to verify it .... that the song was written about a girl Iggy was infatuated with ... and possibly not even Chinese .... I have to admit I prefer the Bowie version ... as much as I love Iggy ... his version is a bit too raw .....

But it got me thinking .... if it was written 40 years ago about a young woman .... then by now, just like me .... a young man grown old .... then so must she ....

So for today's SoD

we have David Bowie 

and one of his greatest hits ....

China Middle Aged Woman ...

Vacuous clouds over Suffolk ........

...... after the vacuous outpouring nonsense by much of yesterday's media, today Suffolk is suffering from a slow news day ......

http://www.ipswichstar.co.uk/news/ipswich_attacked_by_giant_teddy_bear_cloud_1_4375677

It seems amongst the immense grief and total sadness the world felt yesterday after the passing of the near god like Bowie, one Suffolk citizen consoled himself by taking photographs of a teddy bear looking like a cloud .......well according to his wife that is .....

During my days as a ships officer I got me sen a qualification in Meterology, and in my 53 years on this planet I have done a fair amount of cloud watching in my time .... in fact on my iPod  I have a playlist called ..... Cloud Watching ......

Also when I was a young child I had a Teddy bear .... sad thing is I still have him all these years later .... brown teddy he is called ..... simply because he is a brown and he is a teddy......

So in conclusion I think that sort of qualifies me to comment on clouds ..... and Teddy Bears ..... and one thing is for sure ...... this cloud over Suffolk looks nothing like a Teddy Bear ...... but I do agree it does look like a cloud, so the story is at least 50% correct ..... and it definitely is not amazing ...

Seems the Ipswich Star is merely treading water ...... waiting for the next great talent to leave this earth ......

But till then let's once again be reminded of the near god like talent
that was[is] David Bowie ......

Interestingly enough if I were asked to name my one and only all time top musician[s] then it would have to be Paul Buchanan and the Blue Nile .... I have more than once remarked that should the chance present it self, when I pass from this life to the next, it would be listening to the Blue Nile ..... but it is by no accident that David Bowie is the top of the hit parade when it comes to my songs of the day ..... David Bowie (24) -vs- Paul Buchanan (17) .....

They both feature heavily on my series of cancer is shit posts .... because for sure cancer is shit, but thankfully music is not  ..... alas on 4th September 2013, I even suggested that Bowie might well be able to come up with a cure for cancer ...... how wrong was I ..... of course I was wrong ...... on 1st July 2013 tells why I was wrong ......

I was first introduced to David Bowie when I was 8~9 years old .... when I was that old I never cared about cancer ... not even sure I knew what it was then ...... but what I did know .... listening to my elder brothers record collection ...... first it was Hunky Dory, then Ziggy Stardust and next by the time I was 10 years old it was Aladdin Sane .... what I did know at such a tender age ... was I liked the music of David Bowie ...... who would have thought over 40 years later ..... on the eve of his death, he could still look this good .....

Life's a bitch

and then we die.....

 or is it simply just a

Queen Bitch.....

Cancer is shit ..... but this really is taking the piss ......

you've gone too far this time ......

I was trying to think what track to offer up this morning....

I mean how do you choose just one track from this man ...

Initially when I looked out of the window

saw the grey skies

dank rain pouring .... I thought of wild is the wind ..

But as I drove into work,

stopped at the traffic lights .... on red

Rain falling on to the screen

with dull grey skies ...

And then as I sat there, this track started up on the radio

maybe not one of his classics.....

but how with the opening beat ...

no longer a dull grey Monday morning .....

and then again, why not wild is the wind .....

Love me, love me, love me, say you do
Let me fly away with you
For my love is like the wind, and wild is the wind
Wild is the wind
Give me more than one caress, satisfy this hungriness
Let the wind blow through your heart
For wild is the wind, wild is the wind

You touch me,
I hear the sound of mandolins
You kiss me
With your kiss my life begins
You're spring to me, all things to me
Don't you know, you're life itself!

Like the leaf clings to the tree,
Oh, my darling, cling to me
For we're like creatures of the wind, and wild is the wind
Wild is the wind

Like the leaf clings to the tree,
Oh, my darling, cling to me
For we're like creatures in the wind, and wild is the wind
Wild is the wind

As long as you're still smiling, There's nothing more I need, I absolutely love you

But surely that would make her ......

a Girl Saturday ? wouldn't it ?

As for animals and biscuits ...

I love chocolate biscuits

but tend to find cats a bit chewy...

Still any excuse to play 

a bit of Bowie...

Davey ! Davey ! I've got

Friday on my......

Up the hill backwards ........

I have on a number of occasions tackled the London to Brighton bike ride ..... and on each of the past rides, I have never been able to conquer the infamous Ditchling Beacon  ..... 

that is until ........

 

On Sunday 21st June this year, my best mate Mike and I hit the pedals at 7am and it was very congested getting out of central London but we were a bit surprised to pass a Roman Chariot along the way…. 

That must have sounded like a great idea between pints 6 & 7 but 
on the open roads ? 

........ what were they thinking ?

The only drama’s we had to contend with, was Mike getting a puncture at 32 miles, and then me coming out in sympathy 5 miles later with my own puncture. But we were soon back in our rhythm and reached the base of Ditchling Beacon in fine fettle. By this time the sun was out and it was warming up into a nice 22c

So for the assent of DB, I put the bike in to the lowest gear and worked with one simple strategy. As long as I could keep turning the pedals, then the wheels must keep turning away. It is interesting watching people tackle DB with great gusto and for the first quarter of a mile, many are in the saddle pedalling away, but as the climb steepens, you see them one by one dismount.

For sure I was huffing and puffing all the way up and about half way for one brief moment, watching people dismount, I thought how nice it would be to get off the bike and walk ……. But I am not a defeatist and I was here to beat Ditchling Beacon, so I dug in and kept the pedals turning …… and finally 
1 mile and 12 minutes from base camp I reached the summit on 2 wheels…… at 52.5 years old I had finally conquered Ditchling Beacon !

The image of the peak coming into view was a sight to behold ....... 

 And the feeling..... to finally beat the Beacon was wonderful and clearly all the bowls of porridge  [with one or two doughnuts thrown in…. in fact.......lots of doughnuts] and miles of training had paid off. To be fair 12 minutes for the Beacon is slow, when you consider that the pro-cyclist run up there in under 4 minutes, but I didn’t care....... like the Romans in their Chariot heading out of London  

……. Veni, vidi, vici

 
I would imagine that the pro-cyclists could probably cycle up the hill backwards and still beat me ..... but who cares I beat it ...... want to know why personal bests are better than any world record ? .... well anyone can achieve a world record but only you can achieve your PB.

The ride in to the finish line along Maderia drive from the Beacon was wonderful and with my resplendent red shoes I crossed the finishing line with a beaming smile, all completed in a respectable 4 hours. I even raised an healthy sum of money for the BHF .... what the PR guys call a 'win-win'. To add to the occasion the BHF even gave me a medal that matched the prettiest shoes ever to complete the London to Brighton Bike Ride ......

For all the great things me and Mike have done over the years .... we can now add defeating Ditchling Beacon to that list ....... another good reason why we all need a best friend .......

Davey ! Davey ! .... 

didn't you write a song about going up a hill ?

who knows ...... 
maybe next time I will try it backwards ...

and as the wonderful Damien wrote a song about
a Beacon hill
here's a bonus SoD

and the next stop ?

why of course

Pompeii .......

Don't know if this is actually dancing ......

 .... but this is a truely unexpected moment from the movie .....

Mauvais Sang ........

If you love French movies...... 

If you love Juliette Binoche .....

oh Juliette ..... oh Juliette .... wherefore art thou Juliette

doth thee love me like I love thee ? ....

ach erm ..... if you love French art house movies

then you should give it a whirl .....

here is the scene with it's slow burn and then totally unexpected twist....

This is not bollux... this is hazy cosmic jive....

Good job there is a starman 

waiting in the sky......

Maggie will need him to 

help her make a martian

this yet another fantastic track from 1972.... 1972.... I mean like 43 years ago

I am from 1963... I look in the mirror....
I look knackered

This song from 1972
in the head phones....

is still as brilliant as the day it
was first cut to vinyl....

More BBC Bollux.....

... This morning driving into work, I was listening to the BBC today news and they were interviewing the British Candidate trying to be accepted on the dutch mission to put the first humans on Mars.....

What a complete load of bollux.....

Don't get me wrong I love the joy of space travel.... I loved even more the crackle of space dust when you put a whole bag full in ya gob.....

As a 6 year old child being dragged out of my bed at some ungodly hour, sitting in front of a 2 bar electric fire [we were not posh we didn't have central heating in 1969, although we did have an indoor bog, so I suppose that damn near made us working class], but anyway sitting there watching a grainy black and white image on a .... of all things.... a black and white telly...... and finally man first stepped on to the surface of the moon....

It was an incredible thing, I was mesmerised, and I suppose I see that as a monumental moment in mankind..... someone was actually overheard saying..... that it was in fact a giant leap for mankind.......

But since 1969, I have grown older and more cynical.... and so too has the world upon which gravity has firmly affixed me to.

So no matter how many times I hear bullshitters talk about man landing on Mars, I just can't get excited by the prospect.... but effin hell the BBC sure can....

And so it was this morning they were interviewing..... Maggie Lieu.   By all accounts it seems like she is a very bright girl, doing a PhD in astronomy and space, so no slouch in the brian dept, but this morning, her brian must have still been parked in sleep mode...... I have never listened to such a load of utter crap.... and someone has brainwashed this poor girl in to believing the crap she was spouting this morning......

Unfortunately there isn't a link to the actual radio interview unless you want to listen to the whole of this morning's today program on the iPlayer but this exert is a good sample of the conversation....

What if the internet breaks?
"That would be horrible.
"I won't be able to contact home or have any communications with earth, but hopefully we'd be able to repair it because we'll be trained up in every skill we need.
"We'll be trained electricians, doctors, plumbers, anything we need on earth."

What if the internet breaks ? the fooking internet on Mars ? I can't even get a decent broadband speed beyond 1MB from my village in Suffolk and they are talking about wasting a shit load of money getting facebook and twitter to stream on mars... for christ's sake.....

Although...... listening to the interview this morning it did remind me of that famous interview with Laika on 2nd November 1957. For those of you who don't recall Laika, she was the first dog into space.

Here's how the interview went, but as she was a Russian dog you will have to put on a fake russian accent when you read it..... come on we've all done it comrade.....

Interviewer: Laika, you are launching into space tomorrow

Interviewer: Laika, why on earth (ha) wouldn't you be able to come back?

Laika : Woof, woof, woof,

Interviewer: Wouldn't you miss your family and friends?

Laika : Woof, woof, wooooooof,

Interviewer: What do they make of it all?

Laika : Woof, woof

Interviewer: Do you feel guilty?

Laika : Woof, 

Interviewer: Do you want to have a puppies up there?

Laika : Woof,

Interviewer: What are the biggest risks?

Laika : Woof, woof, woof,

Interviewer: What would you live in, what would you wear, how would you keep clean?

Laika : Woof, woof, woof,

Interviewer: What if you get a mega craving for a pack of bonio's when you're there?

Laika : Woof,

Interviewer: Laika..... have you just pissed up my leg ?

Unfortunately we did not get chance to hear how wonderful the experience in space was for Laika..... she died before returning to earth ....... are you reading this Maggie ?? ....... but 1969 was a good time for space adventure.... I mean how else would we have ended up with fantastic images like this.....

A few years back I once saw the space shuttle take off from Cape Canaveral live.... it was without doubt one of the most amazing things I have seen and felt in my life.... and yes you really do feel it...

But in 2015, I think we have more important issues to contend with than trying to put someone on Mars to die .... issues closer to home.... in my case very close.....

In 1969 as a 6 year old boy I was watching man land on the moon, 2 years later I was listening to today's SoD..... little did I realise that when I first heard this album in 1971, some 44 years later on 15th February 2015 and again on 17th Feb,  I would be listening to it once again, and thinking .... this is a brilliant album..... If Hunky Dory is not in your CD collection... then you are no reader of mine.....

David....

It's time for take off....

Is there life on ......

Maggie Lieu has mousy hair ......

I had a dream.......

... not a dream as in Martin Luther King..... I had a dream .....

But as a middle aged man seemingly with a troubled mind ...... I had a dream .....

Now of course, we all dream, it's just that most of the time we are out sparko and the dream get's lost in our sleep...... or if we do remember our dream, we are left thinking..... what the hell was that all about...did I eat some special mushrooms last night ?

We've all had them [dreams I mean, not magic mushrooms] ...... riding down the street on a uni cycle with our underpants on our head, fighting off talking purple bats who want to eat us......

Having a furtive imagination as a kid, I dreamed about alligators and funny enough running down the street in my underpants, fortunately my pants were where they were meant to be and not on my head.... but last night was one of those dreams.... from the minute I woke up, to this point in time as I type this, it has bothered me....

It bothers me because it seems[ed] so real, when I woke up it was as if it had been true, I remember every element of it. Normally with a head full of shit, my dreams get locked away into the dream recess of my head and it is only the shit that is let out of my head, to then be transcribed to this blog.... but today .... this dream was/is clearly a reflection of the thoughts in my mind.... worse still it was entirely contrary to capricorness that is me.....

It is said the truth hurts, and when others give the truth to you, sure sometimes it can hurt, but the truth will hurt the most when it is delivered to you by yourself.

I think that's what has troubled me so much about this dream ...... I walked out of one location/situation and instead of going back to it as I was supposed to, my dream took me to a new place with different people, and a place so different from the one I had left.......what it said to me was I should have walked away some years back and never returned when I had the chance .....

I had my chance and I let it go....
and yet it takes a dream 5 years later to tell me that....
the truth hurts.... this one hurts for sure..... 

and instead of being the Capricorn I thought I am ......

I am merely a weak man....

Hopefully on the night flight to Cairo this weekend maybe I can have less troubling dreams....

Here are 3 repeat SoD's

reflecting my troubling dream

let's hope it is only the SoD's

that are repeated.... I do hope so

It's funny what dreams can do to you

Alex ! ....... Alex ! ....... Alex ! ......... sposami ....

Generally I live in the real world, and don't normally fall in to the trap of the beauty we see in the world of entertainment...... not least of which ...... mistaking the persona we see on the screen as the excuse to fall in love...... apart of course from Debbie Harry that is..... but I was 15 years old at the time....

But leaving Debbie aside....... of course there was also Gillian Anderson in the sex.... ach arm.... X Files....

But leaving aside Debbie and Gillian.... there was that time, Amanda Burton in Brookside..... but apart from Debbie and Gillian and Amanda... well...... although to be fair, I remember wishing I could have a ground hog day with Andie MacDowell.....

So leaving aside Debbie and Gillian, Amanda, Andie well..... oh that reminds me.... Salma Hayek....that scene in Frida... the tango scene.... how could you not fall in love with her.....

Anyway where was I..... oh yes..... apart from Debbie, Gillian, Amanda, Andie, Salma... but thinking about it... there is also the brief flirtation with .....Clare Holman in Lewis.... but it's not too serious with her..... but now........

Now I really have fallen in love with Alex.....

I never paid too much attention in the past, I watched the Hotel Inspector but not bothered too much...They say that beauty is in the eye of the beholder..... but it's not all about stunning goods looks..... let's face it, when I look in the mirror each day, I am reminded of the damage that god can do with a face..... when he said noses...... I thought he said roses and I asked for a big red one .....

But I was watching episode 2 of Alex's Secret Italy on Channel 5.....and oh my gosh......she had me at ciao..... and for the next hour she flirted and beguiled me..... and flirt she did..... as I sat there on the sofa...she looked at me..... it was that secret look in her eyes...aimed just to me.... then I realised I was hooked.... I was her's and she is mine...... her beauty had me enslaved.

Attraction is not always about pure looks alone.....and it's sure as hell is not about.... pwhoar look at the bazookas on her.... but attraction appears in many ways, it can be a look in the eye, a wry smile, a gesture, a comment....but when it hits the bulls eye.... then kappow there is no turning back.....

Her origins are in Italy with the Forte family, and you see her passion and love for the country.... she is not faking it...... and that knowing look she gave me.....

kappow !

who cares whether I am a sad delusional middle aged man.....

Alex ! ....... Alex ! ....... Alex ! ......... sposami ....

As it's time for a Friday SoD 

I was torn between 2 songs.... 

so let's a have double header..... 

because she is worth it....

The man who fell to earth......

... the joke doing the rounds of the internet is they can read my text but they can't find a 300 tonne plane.....

But then I heard a news item on BBC radio today revealing yet another Snowden leak, it got me thinking.

The story can be read here. A notable quote is thus:

The US government has reportedly built a system that can record every phone call made over a month in an undisclosed foreign country.

The National Security Agency (NSA) programme was created in 2009, the Washington Post reported.

Fugitive intelligence contractor Edward Snowden, who leaked details of the system, promised more revelations.

Civil liberties groups called the report "chilling", but US officials would not comment.

An NSA cover slide used for an internal briefing on the system, known as Mystic, shows a cartoon wizard wielding a staff with a mobile phone at the top.

'Time machine'

Mystic is the only known US surveillance programme to capture every single call across a nation's telephone network, according to the Washington Post.

There are many conspiracy theories/theorists awash on the internet, but one follows the theme that Snowden and Assange are double bluffs......  That actually the US can't do half the shit it is being claimed they can do, but they want this shit out there to make everyone think they can do this shit, so they have stooges releasing this shit. It is documented that the theories of UFO's in the 1950's & 1960's were allowed to perpetuate in order to hide the development of secret aircraft by the US military.

So think about the joke again.... it is claimed that the USA can record every single phone call in a certain country over a month and yet they truely can't find this plane..... a plane who's engines talk electronically to the engine builders, telling the engine builders {inter alia} when the engine needs a service and it's arse wiping...... I have no idea as to the number of phone calls made in any one country in any one month, but to record every one of them ?

Now if the US can record all those phone calls, then who knows then maybe they can't find the plane because it is aliens that abducted the plane. Here is a very credible account of the possibility. I am more and more becoming convinced that aliens may well have taken the plane.*

It was Sherlock Holmes who said ......

When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth

Watching that documentary about aliens..... The man who fell to earth, they may well already be amongst us....

So to close out

with today's theory

here is a fantastic song

from that film,

From Roy

one of my all time favorites

grrrrr

and for any excuse to play David Bowie
an equally fantastic song

*{Theories postscript: Theories and jokes a side, I hope for the families of those on board, and perhaps most particularly for those on board, I hope the real reasons for it's disappearance be established. I had never been abroad until I was 16 years old and now 35 years later, I have lost count of how many plane rides I have made since then. I jump on a plane like we jump on a bus or train, but we always assume we will get off safe and well at the other end..... there but for the grace of god go I}

This ain't rock and roll this is.....

genocide ......

So we look at today's headlines and we see the usual violence breaking out.... this time it's Ukraine .... man's inhumanity to man holds no boundaries....

Where next I wonder ?

Then we see Tony Blair was his usual slippery self, defending as quickly as he could the unofficial advice he gave to Rebekah Brooks..... arsehole ..... Tony I mean... he's the arsehole...

Bernie Ecclestone wins his court case but the judge still managed to say he wasn't a truthful or reliable witness.... well there's a surprise...

And then we see a pensioner is declared best british male ..... as inferred here only yesterday....

I am not a big fan of awards ceremonies most particular so called celeb awards as they tend to be nothing more than a narcissists charter... but I did tune in to see if Bowie won.... and sure enough he did... [but not best album award]. Here he is, at 67 years old and declared best british male when the average age of all the other nominees is 22.5 years old.

Not surprisingly Bowie didn't turn up to receive his award, but up trooped Kate Moss. And this is where it all started to fall apart. First off she was wearing a romper suit, presumably as a homage to Bowie in his Ziggy days..... I didn't get the joke last night and still don't get it.... then she prattled some words out, which she could have delivered in morse code and would probably have made more sense....  to those who know [still know] or even don't know how to read morse code.....

Proof if proof were needed as to the waste of time that awards ceremonies are....but it does give me an excuse to choose Bowie again for my SoD..... so ta dah....

There are any one of a number of fantastic tracks I could choose... but prompted by the depressing headlines in Ukraine.... then I chose a brilliant song which I haven't listened to for years...until today...

So to the best male in britain

come on, give it to us

this aint rock and roll

this is genocide.....

I remember exactly where I was.....

...and what I was doing on the day when I first heard this song......

Today's offering is a joint effort, in order to get my Q list endorsed.....

1981, I was home on leave, a cold autumn/winters day and being a poor Deck officer in training I was working on my crappy car. I was in my dad's garage, in what was then my home by proxy....

With the radio playing this song came on, it stopped me in my tracks..... funny how 32 years later I can remember that moment exactly, I can even see my self looking down at that crappy car in the cold listening to today's SoD except it was my former days SoD....

I may age, my mind may sometimes falter, I might get old and disillusioned but there is still music to turn to....

under pressure

always under pressure

but music is my great escape

Freddie...David....

release me

Cancer may always be shit......but dance me to your beauty with a burning violin

.... feeling pretty fed up with life, far too much work to do, against relentless deadlines [most of which are artificially created by my clients].......

thieving bastards everywhere you turn... whether they be money grabbing no-hopers stealing my paid taxes under the auspices of benefits, or motorway services stations stealing my money under the auspices of stay longer than 2 hours and I will shaft you with a £100 fine...... or the building trade who think it entirely appropriate to put their hand in your pocket, do shit work and then fuck off as if it is perfectly normal or just as bad, they waste...ach erm.... steal your time....

when all of a sudden....

my daughter put this link in my email inbox .

I am not normally a big fan of flash mobs and those who stand around them in awe thinking wow this is cool.... but for Deborah Cohen I will make an exception. My mantra these days always seem to be that cancer is shit...... still is, but I will give Deborah her dues, she is finding one way to make it less shit. I won't join the chorus of rebel rousers who gue....go girl ! go girl ! go girl !...... but I will acknowledge that for her, this is her way of dealing with the shit of cancer....

Reading Deborah Cohens caringbridge web page, I like how she encouraged everyone to share her dance at exactly the same time to the same song.

A vicarious dance between strangers. There are no random acts, you can no more separate one life from another than you can separate the breeze from the wind.....mitch albom all over again....the 5 people you meet in heaven.

It sort of reminded me of my sound track moment I once shared with my wife, as I traveled through Amsterdam Airport and her sat at home.

When my daughter shared Deborah Cohen's flashmob with me, she noted the quote with her own......

• "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about dancing in the rain." Thank you for showing me a perfect example of someone dancing in the 'rain'.

• And I realised. It doesn't matter whether we're chewing elephants up bit by bit, hammering walls down on houses, writing countless essays, selling umpteen salmons or simply dancing in the rain... at least we're doing it together. And that's what matters.

So whether it's strangers de-shitting cancer, or daughters who understand the power of love.....

  there will always be a reason to dance......

I was undecided which of 2 tracks

I should use for the SoD

so I'll put up both

and let you decide

Cancer is still shit........... redux...

....it was not that long back, it was being reported that taking Tamoxifen before you get cancer, that some women might be better protected.....

Now it seems there is concern for women who stop taking Tamoxifen post cancer diagnosis......

My wife is one of the 13,000 women each year who take the drug... because reportedly it will save her life, like the 12,999 other women.... problem is, I wonder if she will be one of the 400 ?

In July.......there was my wife, a 15 month [as I wrote then] cancer survivor, sat at the computer looking up all the symptoms of why she feels crap [but she has survived cancer you think,..... oh, not that easy I'm afraid ] ............

look she said..... I have all these symptoms that make me feel crap, all known side effects of taking Tamoxifen.....  

so why don't you speak to your doctor, or your Oncologist or your cancer nurse.... tell them.... I react....

she said....why ?......  they won't do anything....  

oh so you are happy to turn to Dr Google, but not those who are treating you..... what am I supposed to do ? I am just a ridiculous person........ she looked at me..... 

I didn't know what else to say........

And there she was last weekend, a 16 month [as I write now] cancer survivor, sat at the computer looking up all the symptoms of why she feels crap [but she has survived cancer you think,..... oh, not that easy I'm afraid ] ............

.....the same conversation..... look she said, I have all these symptoms that make me feel crap, all known side effects of taking Tamoxifen.....  

so why don't you speak to your doctor, or your Oncologist or your cancer nurse.... tell them.... I react....

she said....why ?......  they won't do anything....  this time I said less...

I didn't know what else to say........ And so out comes today's latest report on Tamoxifen....

Reading the latest commentary as per the Guardian news article, on the one hand it suggests that the women who elect to stop taking the drug are either A) Wrong to do so....... or....... B) Wasting the NHS money [therefore the tax payers money] by doing so.

What did piss me off about this article, was the following comment:

This study is a timely reminder that it's so important that women are given support to continue taking their tamoxifen so that they have the best possible chance to outlive breast cancer.

How about giving them support to cope with the actual side effects perhaps ?

So I might like to suggest another option why women stop taking it......... Option C) Perhaps because Tamoxifen is making them feel ill and with terrible aches and pains, and absent any pain from Cancer, by not taking Tamoxifen the pain stops. My wife is a recently turned 50 year old woman, who was seemingly fit and healthy prior to her diagnosis last year.

Never smoked, ate [eats] the "right" foods, drinks in moderation, not even remotely overweight and perhaps the only major stress in her life is her ridiculous husband...... but now after taking Tamoxifen for the past year....when she first stands up after a period of immobility, hobbles around like an 80 year old woman. Now of course it's not the cancer that makes her hobble.... it's Tamoxifen.

What the article did not say is how many of the 13,000 women stop taking it. It suggests that 400 lives could be saved but 400 out of how many who stop taking the drug ? I would guess that it is more than 400 who stop taking the drug..... a lot more.

Statistics in Cancer are a funny beast. Remembering I am not the one who is ill, I am just the ridiculous husband, as a Cancer Husband your right to enquire is stymied by the apparent mis-representations that your enquiries can have, but one enquiry I did have, was post surgery what was the prognosis ?

So leaving aside all the possible mis-representations of my enquiry, here was the statistic....

Doctor: [words from gob] : Well Mr Ridiculous Husband, women with the same profile and outlook as your wife's diagnosis and treatment have very good odds. After 5 years of first treatment, 96 women out of a 100 will survive. That's good isn't it ? Very positive indeed.

Ridiculous Husband: [words in head, as gob felt no need to do anything].... so that means 100 women with the same profile as my wife will have been given this same rosey happy outlook, but 5 years later, 4 of them will have died..... Those 4 women were told that their chances are very good [because they had the same profile as my wife]..... but actually they died within the 5 years..... not that good a odds when you think about it...... because, they do not know precisely which of the 4 women out of the 100 women will die.....so they were all given the same statistic......

Chemotherapy, radiotherapy, tamoxifen..... non of them are guaranteed to stop cancer coming back, but you daren't not take them.....what if you don't take the treatment and the cancer comes ? what then..... but take them and for sure they will make you feel shit..... but this the rub.....take them, any of them.....and the cancer can still come back.

It comes back to sucking lemons..... sitting there listening to yet another Doctor explaining just what little is actually known about cancer...... with Cancer there are no good choices, there are just better or worse choices..... Tamoxifen is one of those better or worse choices......

Here is the NHS web site stated known side effects of taking Tamoxifen.

Very common: More than 1 in 10 people who take Tamoxifen citrate

• hot flushes
• vaginal and vulval problems such as vaginal discharge, itching of the vulvae or vaginal bleeding - seek medical advice if you have abnormal vaginal bleeding, vaginal discharge, menstrual irregularities, pelvic pain or have a feeling of pressure in the pelvis

Common: More than 1 in 100 people who take Tamoxifen citrate

• bone or tumourpain
• eye or eyesight problems
• feeling light-headed
• fluid retention
• hair loss
• headaches
• high levels of cholesterol or other lipids in the blood which may lead to pancreatitis
• leg cramps
• nausea
• thromboembolism of the veins – seek immediate medical advice if you have a painful and swollen leg or develop breathing difficulties or sudden chest pain

Uncommon: More than 1 in 1000 people who take Tamoxifen citrate

• metabolic problems
• vomiting

Rare: More than 1 in 10,000 people who take Tamoxifen citrate

• abnormal laboratory test results
• angioedema
• blood problems
• hypersensitivity reactions
• liver problems
• skin rash or rashes

Very rare: Fewer than 1 in 10,000 people who take Tamoxifen citrate

• bone marrow problems
• erythema multiforme
• lung problems
• skin problems
• Stevens-Johnson syndrome

The frequency of these side-effects is unknown

• blindness
• endometriosis
• secondary primary tumours

1 in 10 = 1300 of those women
1 in 100 = 130 of those women
1 in 1000 = 13 of those women

Maybe that explains why so many stop taking it...... how selfish.... thfra !

But the reality is, women are simply told....take this..... take this.... this will save your life......

And so it's official ........ 

Cancer is shit....
not that the cancer will kill you though......

 just the fucking treatment !

How do you find a song of the day for that I wonder ?

I bet Bowie could come up with a cure for cancer..... 

he's been compared to God, but I think that's unfair.....

god could no way produce some of the fantastic music that 

bowie has....

I know it might seem churlish and pedantic to say so but.........

What shit reporting by the BBC......aaaaaaagain

This is not.......

I repeat for effect.....

NOT

a shopping trolley.....being ridden at 44mph.

This is a go-kart with a shopping trolley cage attached being ridden at 44pmh

Next time you go down to your local Tesco, look at the wheels on the shopping trolley.....any shopping trolley..... do they have go-kart wheels ? .....do they have a solid chassis ?...... do they have an engine fitted ? do they have batteries fitted ? no......

In which case it is not a shopping trolley.... even the builder of the said go-kart-cum-trolley acknowledged in the article that it......had undergone much modification.

So Mr BBC reporter who ever you are, next time the headline should read.....

Much modified Shopping trolley with go-kart wheels, ridden at 44mph in Devon man's 'record'

as he's enjoying bit of renaissance

this is my SoD

A play list of the day...... Inspired by a man walking around with his knob & tackle hanging out......

... for my last entry, linking to the latest news about Stephen Gough, I did think that considering all the crap weather we have had...... Stephen Gough must be one of the coolest blokes around and so my original SoD for that post had to be.... non other than one of the coolest in music and the song ?

this was my first choice .....

Now....... Iggy Pop apart from being cool, 

he is without doubt one of the prettiest ugly people 

there has ever been, 

but oh what music he has given us.....

I had this album when it came out...

but tapes didn't last very well, so on the strength
of re-finding these songs 

I have re brought the album
in that new CD fangled format.......

what about this song from Iggy from the same album ? 

could you imagine Radio 2 playing this song ?......

erm erm....... think not

In truth you could do an whole blog on Iggy songs
 he is that good...... 

but then of course what about the other coolest men in music ?

how fantastic is this ?

what a fantastic Friday jangly song.....

I have a track by Iggy, singing pretty flamingoes 

and when I youtubed it......

 I got this....

another one of the coolest men in music
with another Friday jangly song....

I love this next song amongst many of Paul Wellers....

he could sing he phone book and still sound fantastic

and then thinking about Paul Weller I was reminded of the time 

I saw him at the Albert Hall and who should join him 

on stage that night...... oh my word..... it was Kelly......

just how cool is this guy ?
{his tribute to Gary Speed}

a few years back I indulged my self and brought a Ferrari

as I drove it home from the garage

this next song was the first song
I played in it........... full throttle

I included this version because the rendition is fantastic....

despite all the blathering at the start
and seriously those people in the back ground ..... 

like a fooking muppet show !!

and so we go from Kelly to Eddie.....

and then this..... with the wonderful Nusrat of course

by now with all this cool we should be damn near artic

but to bring us 9 below zero

.......... how could I miss off my Elvis.... 

oh Jeff......... oh Jeff why did you leave so soon ?

is this really the last goodbye ?

I could write a whole blog about JB too...

and of course the cool list could
go on and on but it is Friday and I need to end
this post somewhere.... so how about I end back where it all started
with

Stephen Gough - The Naked Rambler

Roam Stephen Roam !

A PLoD inspired by a man walking around with his knob & tackle hanging out

Do the RSPCA.........

know about this ?

adds an whole new meaning to the phrase.......

blind as a cat

There can only be one song for it really..... a song from the film of the same name......ooooh the divine Catherine..... oh Catherine ...how I dreamed...... Catherine, every school boys belle de jour......ach erm where was I ?

oh yes, a song from the film of the same name.... but I was reminded of the song from the great scene in Inglourious Basterds...... another one of those perfect placing of a song in a film moments, where the sum of the whole is greater than the individual parts..... and oh my, the song to accompany the divine Mélanie Laurent...... oh Mélanie...... how I dreamed...... Mélanie, every middle aged mans belle de jour...... ach erm ..... the song..... yes the song.....

Come on Davey,

Let's put some fires out

with gasoline

jesus christ....they are not fooking.....

.... heroes ..... I have been a fan of football since a very young boy and whilst it is true I enjoyed playing more than watching.... I do wonder at the sanity of some comments in footballing circles....

Sure enough Wigan's victory at the weekend against Man City in the FA cup final was worthy. When all said and done it was the FA cup......it took me till I was 35 years old to realise that I would never score the winning goal in a FA cup final, but hey I loved the dreams till then...but at the weekend when the commentator said.... and so to the Heroes of Wigan........ jesus christ they are not fooking heroes....they are merely footballers....paid a handsome wage at that....

And then last night as Manchester United completed their bus top tour of the city, one fan remarked on the departure of Alex Ferguson as manager [who for sure is one of the games greatest] the fan said...... it's like losing a member of your family...... erm ...what the fook did he just say ?...it's like what ? ......erm I don't think so.....

But there was one footballer worthy of note......

a nice touch I thought.... 

not because the fan was disabled......no it wouldn't matter what the physical status the fan had....no simply for acknowledging the young lad and giving him a memento to remember a good thing about a footballer...... a nice touch...

only one Sod for it really...