.... it's funny how you see some comment about how this.... or...... that.... will save your life......
Take this drug, it will save your life .......
Don't shun 3D printers - they might save your life one day
5 Gadgets that will save your life
Even.... even this one.....
Joining the WI could save your life......
utter tosh......
In the words of the great Private Frazer..... we're all doomed.....doomed I tell ya.....
The truth is nothing will actually save your life, because we are all bound to die one day. Now of course, I realise that in saying such, I have not declared some great revelation as if we didn't already know it. But it started with Tamoxifen and then it led back to the world of being a Cancer Husband.
I am no chemist, I am no doctor, I am no cancer specialist..... I am just a ridiculous person.
The recent news about using Tamoxifen as a pre-cancer protection brought out the usual nonsense to make the choice for women even harder. Some headlines even talk about Tamoxifen providing a 20 year protection against Cancer......... as if it was a proven fact, a proven magic sweetie that you swallow each day and ta dah your life has been saved !
WRONG.... A BIG FAT FUCKING WRONG !
So there was my wife, a 15 month [as I write] cancer survivor, sat at the computer looking up all the symptoms of why she feels crap [but she has survived cancer you think,..... oh, not that easy I'm afraid ] .......
look she said, I have all these symptoms that make me feel crap, all known side effects of taking Tamoxifen.....
so why don't you speak to your doctor, or your Oncologist or your cancer nurse.... tell them.... I react....
she said....why ?...... they won't do anything....
oh so you are happy to turn to Dr Google, but not those who are treating you..... what am I supposed to do ? I am just a ridiculous person........ she looked at me.....
I didn't know what else to say........
And that's the reality, there is nothing that will save your life, but it will sure as hell make you feel crap in the process. But the joke is, it makes those around you feel crap as well.
That's the thing about cancer... sure you win the first battle, but do you really think you will win in the end ?
But why should I be allowed to say this ? ..... I am not ill..... I am not the one with Cancer, I am not the one at risk of dying........ well guess what...... I will die and I will die one day when I least want it to happen.
I can remember some events from 30 years ago as if it were yesterday. So here I sit 50 years old and I doubt I will live to 100....... it will be pure luck to make to 90.......but who knows I might just get to 80........ but if I can remember back 30 years ago as if it were yesterday, could my death at 80 seem like tomorrow ?
So that is what is shit about being a cancer husband..... you have to get it right all the time, you're not allowed to be negative, you're not allowed to say the wrong thing, you're not allowed to fail the test of telepathy....
But why shouldn't I be allowed to feel like this ? ...... do you have to be ill to have a view ? do you have to be ill to be pissed off about something ?
The other thing I noted about being a Cancer husband...... every bit of news, every commentary, every web link associated with cancer or those who loose their battle with cancer, and you are hooked there is no escape.
Listening to the radio the other morning, I heard this lady talk about the loss of her husband and his bravery towards the end. I should out of respect offer up their names, but I'll shan't and not because I am being disrespectful. But she spoke of the book he wrote as he faced his own death.
I looked the book up, very inspiring indeed......... the glowing reviews from people who were touched by his wisdom and how it would make them reflect and change their own lives before they got ill........ and then the web page said.... people who brought this book also brought this one..... and there it was......... another book by another brave person who also bravely faced his own death from cancer..... and yet more glowing reviews from people who were touched by his wisdom and how it would make them reflect and change their own lives before they got ill...... stop ! stop ! stoooooop ! I screamed.....
I don't want to be brave and wise about my death or anyone else's for that matter...... And that's part of the problem....... sometimes I just want to be a ridiculous person.
One of my favourite books of all time is Tuesday's with Morrie, written by Mitch Albom. I read it long long before, I thought I could ever end up as a Cancer Husband.... and oh my word what a telling book to read. I brought it at Heathrow airport, and on a flight to the West Indies I opened the first page with the plane on the runway at Heathrow, and finished it non stop with time for a film before the plane landed in Barbados.
This book says many things, not least of which Morrie Schwartz did not die of cancer, he died of Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. There are many parts of Mitch Alboms writings I can quote but Morrie talks about the quote from W H Auden [a wonderful insight full poet] the comment -
Take this drug, it will save your life .......
Don't shun 3D printers - they might save your life one day
5 Gadgets that will save your life
Even.... even this one.....
Joining the WI could save your life......
utter tosh......
In the words of the great Private Frazer..... we're all doomed.....doomed I tell ya.....
The truth is nothing will actually save your life, because we are all bound to die one day. Now of course, I realise that in saying such, I have not declared some great revelation as if we didn't already know it. But it started with Tamoxifen and then it led back to the world of being a Cancer Husband.
I am no chemist, I am no doctor, I am no cancer specialist..... I am just a ridiculous person.
The recent news about using Tamoxifen as a pre-cancer protection brought out the usual nonsense to make the choice for women even harder. Some headlines even talk about Tamoxifen providing a 20 year protection against Cancer......... as if it was a proven fact, a proven magic sweetie that you swallow each day and ta dah your life has been saved !
WRONG.... A BIG FAT FUCKING WRONG !
So there was my wife, a 15 month [as I write] cancer survivor, sat at the computer looking up all the symptoms of why she feels crap [but she has survived cancer you think,..... oh, not that easy I'm afraid ] .......
look she said, I have all these symptoms that make me feel crap, all known side effects of taking Tamoxifen.....
so why don't you speak to your doctor, or your Oncologist or your cancer nurse.... tell them.... I react....
she said....why ?...... they won't do anything....
oh so you are happy to turn to Dr Google, but not those who are treating you..... what am I supposed to do ? I am just a ridiculous person........ she looked at me.....
I didn't know what else to say........
And that's the reality, there is nothing that will save your life, but it will sure as hell make you feel crap in the process. But the joke is, it makes those around you feel crap as well.
That's the thing about cancer... sure you win the first battle, but do you really think you will win in the end ?
But why should I be allowed to say this ? ..... I am not ill..... I am not the one with Cancer, I am not the one at risk of dying........ well guess what...... I will die and I will die one day when I least want it to happen.
I can remember some events from 30 years ago as if it were yesterday. So here I sit 50 years old and I doubt I will live to 100....... it will be pure luck to make to 90.......but who knows I might just get to 80........ but if I can remember back 30 years ago as if it were yesterday, could my death at 80 seem like tomorrow ?
So that is what is shit about being a cancer husband..... you have to get it right all the time, you're not allowed to be negative, you're not allowed to say the wrong thing, you're not allowed to fail the test of telepathy....
But why shouldn't I be allowed to feel like this ? ...... do you have to be ill to have a view ? do you have to be ill to be pissed off about something ?
The other thing I noted about being a Cancer husband...... every bit of news, every commentary, every web link associated with cancer or those who loose their battle with cancer, and you are hooked there is no escape.
Listening to the radio the other morning, I heard this lady talk about the loss of her husband and his bravery towards the end. I should out of respect offer up their names, but I'll shan't and not because I am being disrespectful. But she spoke of the book he wrote as he faced his own death.
I looked the book up, very inspiring indeed......... the glowing reviews from people who were touched by his wisdom and how it would make them reflect and change their own lives before they got ill........ and then the web page said.... people who brought this book also brought this one..... and there it was......... another book by another brave person who also bravely faced his own death from cancer..... and yet more glowing reviews from people who were touched by his wisdom and how it would make them reflect and change their own lives before they got ill...... stop ! stop ! stoooooop ! I screamed.....
I don't want to be brave and wise about my death or anyone else's for that matter...... And that's part of the problem....... sometimes I just want to be a ridiculous person.
One of my favourite books of all time is Tuesday's with Morrie, written by Mitch Albom. I read it long long before, I thought I could ever end up as a Cancer Husband.... and oh my word what a telling book to read. I brought it at Heathrow airport, and on a flight to the West Indies I opened the first page with the plane on the runway at Heathrow, and finished it non stop with time for a film before the plane landed in Barbados.
This book says many things, not least of which Morrie Schwartz did not die of cancer, he died of Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. There are many parts of Mitch Alboms writings I can quote but Morrie talks about the quote from W H Auden [a wonderful insight full poet] the comment -
love each other or perish
I don't want to be a Cancer husband, I don't want to read about brave people,
I just want to be a ridiculous person.
but ridiculous husband or not
for my SoD I choose this
