The week link.....

From the intensity of two 18+hr working days in Warsaw to a Suffolk village hall......

One minute I am absorbing huge amounts of data, trying to analyse the where fores and why fores of who knicked a full truck load of TV's and it's financial implications and then on my return home, I am press ganged into attending my local village hall fashion show.

To be a fair a lot of effort was put into this show and the money raised helps pay for the up keep of things such as the village hall, which to many in my village [including me] is seen as one of the building blocks of community life. We can have all the trappings of modern living, plentiful food, gadgets and their constant upgrades on demand, wall to wall reality shows but you can never ignore the simplicity of human spirit joined by a simple goal like raising a few quid for the village amenities.

There I sat towards the back of the room, watching the audience [mainly ladies] and oh how they laughed and smiled at the banter of the compères..... then there was the models..... not stick thin expressionless no marks..... but village members....Queenie.....oh gosh how she milked the lime light..... she looked a million dollars and boy did she know it.....

And so there I sat, the juxtaposition of my life..... one minute stuck in a Warsaw board room for 2 days as we trawled through reams of documents and emails analysing every word, every detail, as though it was the most important thing in the world.....and yet the following day the most important thing was that no one tripped up or missed their cue.

And so at the end of the fashion show, we CvL [clapped very loudly] and SvL [smiled very loudly] and we congratulated the participants and the organisers for a wonderful evening.........

Two days in Poland may pay the bills, but two hours in my village hall rewards the soul.....

One of the songs that accompanied the strutting models was a song I've not heard for years but always love it...... then it gave me the idea for this weeks themed SoD's..... to be loosely linked by the title...

So for the first week link

let's start by going downtown

Ladies you can keep your rabbits.....I'm a bunnyman !

.... after listening to Echo & the Bunnymen yesterday I had forgotten just how good this band is....

Sadly they are a man down from the original line up, after Pete De Freitas was killed in a motorcycle accident in 1989. Plus the Bunnymen had been through bit of an hiatus during this time.... but having seen them at the height of their popularity in the early 80's and more recently since their reformation.... they loose nothing of their appeal.

I love some of the current bands and music, as I think my SoD's can testify.... but there is still some great music since the 70's & particularly 80's. It is true that some 80's pop sync has not lasted well, but you only have to look at the likes of David Byrne and his ilk to know that some music can be played and replayed in any era and still sound good.

So put away your rabbits 

and get out the bunnymen

It's Monday.....

... and I was going to prattle on about how it was only a jooooke.... not a very funny one but a joke never the less....but instead of commenting about Adrian Chiles jokes about poles, it seems later this week I'm off to Poland* instead, so may be I'll get the joke there..... so instead of prattling on,  I was minded of this song....so I am listening to the whole album whilst I do proper work [as opposed to improper work .... like say a pole dance].....

This album, probably their most seminal work, takes me back to my formative years studying to be a ship's officer....

Hit it Ian...

and some 27 minutes or so
into the album and I remember
I love this song....
almost as much as pies

*[Once more I take to the air with Wizz Air....... I do so hope it's not another case of Whiff Air ! ]

Maria de Villota......

So it's Friday morning, and desert Island disc time again, and this time instead of my doctor being the reason for me listening....it was Jewsons fault this time....

And so I am listening to Carolyn McCall, the very intelligent and articulate CEO of Easyjet. But I did start to wonder if really Desert Island Discs is merely a narcissist charter. Truthfully, we are all narcissists to a greater or lesser extent, even blogging lends it's self very well to those of us suitably afflicted...... but on DiD the interviewees talk about their lives whilst the divine Kirsty blows smoke up their arses and then we get to listen to the personal taste of the interviewees music and if it matches ours...we gue.... oh yeah I agree, I like you...... and if it don't, our mind switches off....

Carolyn McCall is a very successful person and I like how she de-genders men by calling them blokes, she doesn't have to prove she is any male equal in the boardroom, she is clearly the boss.

There is no doubt that when her DNA was put into the blending tub, she got a very healthy smattering of cleverness [with only a teenie weenie dash of smugness that she got the xx chromosomes]..... you cannot but admire both her wit and wisdom and what she has made of her life..... she has many admirable traits.... but I was listening against the back drop of the just announced death of Maria de Villota.

You may not have heard of Maria but she offered up, and I think delivered many of the admirable traits that are exhibited by Carolyn McCall.........Maria was intelligent, smart, winning in a man's world, attractive, successful..... so listening to how successful Carolyn McCall was/is and yet Maria de Villota's life ended today at a mere 33 years old without the chance for her to achieve her full potential. On Monday she was due to promote her autobiography...... Life is a gift.

Now don't get me wrong, not for one second do I in any way denigrate Carolyn McCall for there is much to admire about her, but it's the contrast of 1 life good -vs- 1 life lost.

2 comparable women slightly overlapping generations, but for Maria De Villota it seems like there was her 360 degree sliding door moment last year.

She was on the cusp of breaking onto the front row grid of Formula One, a very male dominated world and then one day during a test drive at Duxford Airport, at the end of her run, for reasons which have never been identified her car ran straight into a stationery equipment truck.

She was lucky to survive, but she lost her right eye and with it her hopes of making big time in F1. I for one would have loved to have seen her race with the big boys and show them a thing or two.....but here we are little over a year later and she has left this world.... the cause of her death far too early for us observers to know.

I would have liked to think that Maria De Villota in some years to come, could have been on Desert Island Disc's telling us [in a narcissistic way] all the wondrous things in her life.....like the time she became the first woman world F1 champion in the bloke dominated world.

****************************************

Be open to your dreams, people 

Embrace that distant shore 

Because our mortal journey is over all too soon

****************************************

are they taking the piss......

I saw the BBC headline for this link ..........   Print your own bladder  ....and my only reaction was.... why ? ...... why the hell would I want to print a 3d version of my own bladder ?

But who knows...... maybe this bloke had and he was testing it out ? Maybe he is a waterboy.....it looks like he was ready to exhibit the whole of his moon......

Since first posting this, I then saw this with my next click on BBC dot com......

Do you really need to drink eight cups of water a day?

This headline caught my eye, because one of my top 10 is a drink of water. Reading the article I did think...blimey I'd have never worked that out ...... drink more water and you pee more....

But no matter how isotonic I make my body by my water intake it will never make me a finely tuned athlete but it still tastes good. I recall working in the Middle East in the height of their summer in my younger days. Walking around the deck of a ship on cargo duty under the Dubai midday sun and then tasting that first sip of ice cold water mixed with the first gasp of air conditioned air and there was nothing on the planet that could beat it.

For sure, fast cars, pretty women, sex, money all can bring a sense of euphoria to the party but at that second of consumption in that heat I would take the glass of water any time. Of course in the less warmer climes of good ole blimey, water still tastes good...but 8 glasses a day ? I might be a waterboy but I am definitely only a 1-a-day man....and I have no intention of getting my ars....ach erm moon out to flash anyone....... 

 

 

 

arses redux.....

...... I must be getting old..... now they are arguing over the origins of the twerk .....

Is Iggy of this world ? what in god's name is she prattling on about in the video interview ?..... 

who knows maybe I am not of this world..... 

twerking is bigger than us

talking of ars......ach erm horses.....

.... I see that John McCririck seems to be making bit of a horse of him sen.....

Every time you hear him wittering on these last couple of days, he keeps banging on about how channel 4 fired him because of his age.... and that it is outrageous and he will fight on behalf of all those who are targeted by this particular .... ism

I'd like to think the BBC report was spot on [but who can tell these days] but assuming accuracy in the reporting of JM's comment:

McCririck admitted there had been plenty of complaints to Channel 4 about his behaviour, and accepted descriptions of him as "nasty, revolting, rude", "boorish", and "obnoxious and sexist".

But he added: "I was fully aware that Channel 4 approved of it because they kept on having me on their programmes."

So what JM hasn't yet worked out, is that by taking him off their programmes they no longer approved [tacitly or otherwise] of his "nasty, revolting, rude", "boorish", and "obnoxious and sexist" behaviour.

So McCririck was fired not because of his....... age......... but because ......by his own admission..... he was/is {delete as appropriate} ..... nasty, revolting, rude, boorish, obnoxious and sexist in his behaviour.

I reckon John McCririck is odds on favorite to lose his case against Channel 4 et al. When will so called celebs learn..... control your behaviour .... it's not big and it's not clever....

Cue 2 great SoD

and they're under starters orders

it's neck and neck

oooh dear McCririck has fallen at the first hurdle

still not to worry

U2 and Icicle Works are romping home

for this one

usual rules

phone off

speakers on
full volume

hit it Ian

what a complete arse......

... we are a funny breed.... maybe it's because of the wide access to stories across the internet and it's somewhat instantaneous nature that we see so much, that at times can be ...... is there a truely a parallel universe ?

There you are, seeing the reported suffering of children in Syria, brutality in Keyna, financial mismanagement by governments all around the globe, the frustrations of Mark Neary [and he's not alone it seems], and then with the next click you are greeted with this......

I am shakkin my ass baby......

I looked at this and thought are these people really serious, they have gone to all this trouble, with Big Freedia organising it........ just looking at some of the people, it's like nothing else matters in the world but they must writhe their arses in a rhythmic manner, one women is damn near orgasmic when the GWR bloke confirms the WORLD record for twerking.......

But hey hang on a minute..... when I thunked about it some more, perhaps I am the dumb ass.... here I sit bashing away at the keyboard bleating about the things in life that make me bleat [not all the time though] and here I sat looking at all those asses being twerked....... maybe I'm the dumbass. They are out there smiling and doing something that makes them feel good.

I agree, it's not much good to the children of Syria or those who suffered in Keyna, not much chance of bailing governments out with a twerk [its the twats in government we need to worry about] and I'm sure that twerking is not the answer to Mark Neary's challenges..... but looking at those faces [yes I did look at the faces and not the asses ....or should that be butts, as corrected by one interviewee] and gosh they were all smiling.... may be I am a dumbass after all.....

only one SoD for it,

I see ya baby,

I see ya

to end the jingly jangly week....

...to be honest I think we'd need a 56 day week, because for a jingly jangly week there's load of songs I could choose...but still, for this week I choose this one as my last jingly jangly SoD...for this week at least.

We met by a trick of fate.....

or was it... 

 a 360°sliding door moment ?

its a jingly jangly week.....

...how about this oldie for a jingly jangly Thursday

you're my brown eyed girl

hit it Van !....

sod the news...sod being pissed off....it's Wednesday SoD...

....a jingly jangly Wednesday SoD

same rules,

same volume,

same jingly jangly feeling

To continue the jingly jangly theme...consider this as.....

a Jingly Jangly Tuesday SoD.... 

The news is still miserable, Damien Mcbride is still a twat, his publisher is an even bigger one, and Webber punished for thumbing a lift....thfra....

so usual rules apply....

put the phone on the hook...

mobile on silent...

plug in the Bose speakers....

crank up the volume to it's highest setting...

and I defer you not to feel jingly jangly

A jingly jangly......Monday...

......song from a very young Paul Weller.... and the alternative ?

Reflecting on the madness in Keyna..... so today I shall stick my head in the sand, arse in the air and instead reflect on a warm summer like jingly jangly Monday song instead.

That's a very expensive coffee......

£500M for a Costa Concordia .........

When you consider the apparent stupidity of the circumstances of the way the Costa Concordia came to grief with the loss of 32 lives, it's hard to imagine how a ship of that size could have [should have] ended up on her side on the rocks in the first place ....

My whole adult working life, has been dominated by ships and shipping. The first ship I saw close up and dangerous was at the tender age of 16.5 years old and it was the ship that would be my home for the next 4 months.

I had signed up to the Merchant Navy and yet I had never seen a ship, let alone been on one. Up to that point I had not been in possession of a passport. Also at that time I couldn't even swim, but some how I was walking up the gang plank armed with a sea survival certificate....but that is another story.....

So there I was a young boy stood on the deck..... there's a joke somewhere in that....there I stood looking at this mammoth ship thinking I'll be truely safe aboard this ship. When ships are in port they seem immovable objects and you cannot imagine them coming to grief..... This ship was relatively small in the world of ocean going ships Mv Border Shepherd [she was not that rusty when I sailed on her] and one of the biggest ships I sailed on was the British Trident*** at nearly a qtr of a mile long, but the reality is no matter how big the ship is, once you get to sea... then there is no guarantee you will survive the mercy of the weather [or the stupidity of Italian skippers] .... but just look at the recent events for the MoL Comfort.

And so watching them raise the Costa Concordia from it's watery grave, you can only but marvel at the skill in getting the vessel upright once more.

The cost of £500M is quite eye watering when you think about, a few years ago many might have simply said leave her to rot and waste away, some would still say it now..... but we live in changing times, and so the money was spent and the engineering work done**. They estimated about 12 hours to get her up to the vertical.

So about half way up, and some dickhead of a BBC reporter asks one of the senior salvage engineers a question..... [BBC reporter] You said it was going to take 12 hours but now it seems that it will take much longer what's gone wrong ?...... Now at this point the engineer gave a thoroughly polite answer and said...... nothing is going wrong, all is going to plan...... what he should have done is taken the microphone off the reporter and shoved it up the reporters poop deck ! What a twat that reporter is....... Salvaging a vessel of this size cannot be timed to the minute..... this was a one off, that took over a year to prepare and not forgetting the £500M spent, so I think the salvage team can be given quite a bit of leeway in not worrying about rushing to meet the 12 hour deadline......

Whether the cost was good value for money is a debate for a different forum, but for this week at least, one can only but marvel at the salvage whilst you sip and slurp your very expensive Costa....

As Desert Island Discs is about to return.... 

As it is Friday..... 

if I was on my Desert Island, 

this is the song* I would be humming 

as my SoD

*[SoD footnote:  I had originally planned to use the great EC's version of this, but as I have not yet aired this band and as this version is very commendable, I chose....... Suede]

**[Salvage footnote: I wonder if we will spend this much recovering wind turbines from a watery grave once they have passed their serviceable life ? ]

***[Ships sinking footnote: The British Trident recovered the crew from the supposedly sunken oil tanker the Salem. It turned out the Salem had not sunk. Part of the clue was when the crew of the ship were recovered from their life boats, they all had packed suit cases with them. When your ship is sinking, packing a case would not be a high priority. As it was, the Salem had not sunk and instead the crew were changed, the ship painted with a new name, and her precious and valuable cargo of oil was sold to the South African Oil Company, as at that time there were trade embargoes on South Africa as a result of apartheid.... oh what a tangled web we weave..... and so as a bonus SoD here is a great track......]

quote of the day.....

I am not a misogynist

I like women very much

in their right place